Graduate School in an Abusive Husband

Graduate school is an abusive husband.  You love him, and he beats you.   But he didn't mean it.  You'll forgive him.  You need him.  And you deserved it anyway.  How could you be some dumb and worthless?  You're afraid to leave.  Without him you're nothing.

Booby Juice

Booby juice.  That's what my five year old nephew calls breast milk.  He was so fascinated watching me feed Little One.  "Did I drink booby juice when I was a baby?" "Yes, babies drink booby juice," his mother replied.  But when he saw a bottle of expressed milk on the table he exclaimed with tears in his eyes, "I don't want to drink that booby juice!"  Thank goodness!  It would have been far more awkward if he had asked for some.

I'm reminded of this story because in a few short months Little One will be turning 1.  And I'm now facing the question, will she still be drinking booby juice?  Or would it be better if I gave her cow's milk, goat's milk, soy milk, almond milk, or no milk?

I love breast feeding my daughter.  Especially now that she's constantly on the move.  It's the only time I really get to cuddle with her.  Unfortunately I'm away from her 40 hours a week and when we are together (and she's awake) she won't drink it 'straight from the tap'.  That's right, she'll only latch when she's half asleep.  That means I have to pump four times a day so she has enough milk to drink.  With setup, pumping and clean up that works out to about two hours a day!   And I loathe pumping.  (I'll have to detail the pros and cons of breast feeding and pumping elsewhere.)

So now back to the question.  What should Little One drink after she turns one?  I'd like for her to continue having booby juice as a part of her diet.  The World Health Organization recommends babies be fed breast milk until at least two years old.  In fact, if she drank 'right from the tap' I don't think I'd even be thinking about this right now.  But two hours is a good chunk of time.  It'd be great if I could spend it doing something rather than fighting off  a nine month old that wants to play with and pull on the breast pump.

Maybe adding in a glass of something else once a day?  But what to choose?  They all seem like bad options to me.  Little One gets an upset tummy when I drink cow's milk, so that's out.  Goat's milk and soy milk taste heinous to me.  And we're trying very hard to feed Little One what we eat.  Getting special milk just for her complicates things.  The whole purpose of this blog is to simplify to make my life easier!  That leaves almond milk or no milk.  I love the taste of almond milk.  And vanilla almond milk tastes a lot like breast milk.  (You were curios too, right?  But it's a nut, and I'm worried about allergies.

This article from my favorite breast feeding site, kellymom, provided a lot of insight.  I think I'll try to pump Little One full of good solid food, and hope she cuts back on booby juice on her own.  And maybe throw in a glass of almond milk once in a while.  Well, I guess this counts as a plan.  Kind of.  Has anyone else out there tried to partially wean?

Taking back the house

Well I'm going to start by taking back my house.  It's so CLUTTERED!  Every night I go home and there's just stuff everywhere: toys across the floor, clothes on the couch, and dishes pilled up in the sink.  It's not a complete disaster, I don't need an intervention from Clean House, but it's enough that I constantly feel stressed out.  So this weekend I got motivated.  I don't know how or why it happened, but I just decided.  Time to take back the house!

Please spay and neuter your clutter.

The downstairs had been cleaned Wednesday since we had had company over that evening.  It wasn't too hard to jam any clutter back in to its appropriate box, basket or drawer.  Not a permanent solution, but it looks much nicer.  Picking up all the toys to vacuum turns into quite a battle with a 9 month old going around behind you and throwing them back out.  So, what the heck, I pushed the toys out of the way as needed while vacuuming.  Little one thought that was funny.  Then I swept while little one and the dog tried to eat the dust bunnies I had collected.  I decided to skip the kitchen for now.  We cook a lot, so I'd be motivated to clean there later.  Next we went upstairs.  I went into my closet and started purging things I've been sick of looking at: linens we no longer need, clothes my husband never wears.  I bagged it all up.  My husband now has one month to go though the bag and remove 'cherished' items.  Little one had a great time taking clean laundry out of the basket and throwing it on the floor.  At least she was having a good time.  In little one's room, we moved out the changing table.  Little one helped me push it into the hall.  She's such a big girl now.  I replaced it with a short dresser.  This way little one can't keeping throwing her clean cloth diapers and blankets on the floor, but we can still use it for diaper changes.  By this time I was getting tired.  We went back down stairs and I finished up by cleaning the kitchen.

While my house still isn't completely where I want it, at least I've made a step in the right direction.  Now the tricky part is keeping it clean all week.  If I can quickly clean the downstairs this weekend, then I can tackle my upstairs hallway.  Then I can take the bags (three so far) of purged items and donate them.  Wish me luck! I'll post picture and give you and update soon (I hope).

Taking it back

Taking back what you might ask? Me! I have no control in my life. My house is a mess - my stuff rules the roost. My husband works long hours - we need the money. I have a nine month old - have you ever tried reasoning with a baby? I'm a physical science graduate student - the epitome of serfdom. I'm so tired, and hungry, and burnt out. I used to be, now I constantly do. No time for thinking or being in the moment. So you know what? I'm taking back Rini!